I have always been easily amused by other people's unfortunate discharge of their "hot air." Tell me a good fart story and I'm laughing my butt off, tears running down my face and gasping for air. But this was my undoing many years ago.

I used to sing with a chorus group and our performances were always well attended. I had the honor of standing next to one of our more elderly members, a rather straight-laced, dignified and proper lady .... a dear lady of whom I was quite fond. Well, you guessed it .... during a performance, right after this long note at the end of the song, she let one rip. I'm sure the audience members in the front were wondering where the percussion instrument suddenly came from!! And this dear soul didn't bat an eyebrow, didn't move a muscle. Everyone is trying to remain calm, and does a pretty good job of it, except me.

I felt the laugh building inside me and I'm saying to myself "not now, not now." I notice our director trying not to laugh, and some of the chorus members trying to get away from the smell (while standing on the top row of four foot high risers). I'm muffling my laugh but I can't stop the tears from coming down my face as the accompanist starts the intro for the next song. Luckily I'm standing on the end, so I just slowly step off the riser and into the backstage.

I must've laughed for five minutes straight. Of course, I got my butt chewed by the director for leaving the performance, but I think he understood.

What's sad is that this deal soul died about a year ago, and I miss her terribly. I would give anything to have her - and her hot air - back with us, with no laughing this time.

Submitted by Robbie