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Dairy Queen plus lactose intolerance...
One summer my kids wanted Dairy Queen ice cream cones. Since I am lactose intolerate I'm usually able to abstain but on this hot summer day I thought I'd have one too. I'd planned to go straight home but after consuming the cone I remembered I needed to stop at the fabric store. As I was standing at the back of the cavernous store with no one around I discovered I needed to let off a little pressure. What thought would be silent ending up sounding like the "crack" of a homerun hit off the sweet spot of the bat. The acoustics were amazing. As I turned around to be sure that no one heard the "release" I saw one lone woman behind me with eyes as big as saucers and her cheeks puffed up as she held her breath. Our eyes locked. No body moved. It was the most embarrsing moment of my life. That was 20 years ago and I remember it like it was yesterday!

Submitted by Penny P.
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