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Last May 22 I was out at wunderground and noticed something really scary.<br> <br> ----<br> May 22, 2009 Rise: Set:<br> Actual Time 5:50 AM EDT 8:20 PM EDT<br> Civil Twilight 5:19 AM EDT 8:51 PM EDT<br> Nautical Twilight 4:41 AM EDT 9:29 PM EDT<br> Astronomical Twilight 3:59 AM EDT 10:11 PM EDT<br> Moon 4:03 AM EDT 6:38 PM EDT<br> Length Of Visible Light: 15h 31m<br> Length of Day <br> 14h 30m<br> Tomorrow will be 1m 30s longer.<br> ----<br> <br> <br> Tomorrow will be 1.5 minutes longer!?!??!<br> <br> Well, I quickly put together a computer model and discovered that before long,<br> if this trend continued, days could be weeks long.<br> <br> <br> I checked back the next day and sure enough the day was longer and the next<br> day was forecasted to be longer too. Oh my gosh. This was going to play heck with my flexible work schedule!<br> <br> <br> <br> Well, I tracked it for several weeks then saw my predictions weren't matching<br> the outcome. Days were not becoming more than 24 hours long.<br> <br> I saw my mistake. Nights were getting shorter in the same amount!<br> <br> So I modified my model.<br> <br> And I discovered that before long there would be no night at all!<br> <br> This was terrible. All nocturnal life would be threatened.<br> <br> <br> <br> I've tracked the data since then and, while the days have not progressed at<br> the rate I expected, I can only attribute this to random fluctuations in an<br> extremely complex system.<br> <br> At its core, I know my model is sound. After all, I run it on a super computer.<br> <br> <br> We must act NOW to prevent this catastrophe. I contend that this phenomenon<br> of global spinning is a product of people walking more forcefully when they go<br> westward than when they go eastward. I've commissioned a study and found that<br> many houses have doors facing westward and people leave their houses<br> energetically in the mornings and return more wilted in the evening.<br> <br> <br> I propose, nay demand, a moratorium on building any houses with west facing<br> doors. East is best. Or towards the equator, if east is really too hard, but<br> you'll need a gov't waiver for that.<br> <br> Won't you please join this effort?<br> <br> For the children...
By commander vimes
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