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Back in the early 90s I was in the USAF and had an airman under me. This guy was pretty much a problem child from day one and never seemed to understand why I would get so upset with him. This is just about one of the situations I had with him. Our duty day started at 0715. At 0730 my airman wasn't in the office yet and we hadn't received a call from him. By 0800 my supervisor told me to go over to the dormitories (where the airman lived) to see if everything was okay. I drove to the other side of a pretty big base and went to the airman's room. I knock on the door and after a few minutes he answers the door, in his boxers, having just climbed out of bed to answer the door! I asked him why he wasn't at work and he said he couldn't get into his wall locker where his uniforms were. I asked why he didn't call me to tell me this, he said he was "going to" (I guess after he finished his relaxing rest). I told him to get his butt in the shower and I would be back in 10 minutes to drive him to work (he didn't have a car either). I went to the dorm manager's office and asked him to accompany me back up to the airman's room so we could try to get into his locker, while he was in the shower. Well, we go in and there are two wall lockers in the room. One is definitely jammed and we can't get it open. So I ask the dorm manager to open the other locker and lo and behold! there are about 3 or 4 uniforms hanging neatly. I leave again and come back in about 5 minutes to give the airman time to get decent after his shower. I ask the airman what's in the jammed locker, he says "uniforms"; then I ask him what is in the other locker and ask him to open it. He does and I ask him what those things hanging in there are. He tells me they're uniforms, all the while looking at me like he doesn't understand what I'm getting at. I ask him why he didn't put one of these uniforms on and get to work on time, he tells me "well, those are dirty uniforms"!!!! Hanging neatly!!! We worked in an office, you don't get dirty doing paperwork. I told him to put on a "dirty" uniform and meet me at my car. Needless to say, that coupled with his other screw ups we kicked him out of the AF and sent him back to Mommy.
By TJE
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