The Senate version of the healthcare bill (Max Baucus' bill) continues to morph. Yesterday the Finance Committee approved an amendment that would allow employers to charge workers more for their insurance coverage if they choose to lead unhealthy lifestyles. Employers would be able to adjust premiums by as much as 50% for workers who choose to become their own land masses complete with their own weather systems, or who chose to smoke. Good. We know that blubberbutts spend 42% more than normal weight people on medical costs. This is a lifestyle choice. People should pay for their lifestyle choices.

Naturally, some people aren't pleased with this idea. They say that this is going to lead to discriminatory practices and make healthcare coverage unaffordable for "those who need it most." Awwww. What a shame. These people eat their way to diabetes and then they plead "discrimination" when they have to pay more for health care? Sorry, but I'm not down with subsidizing someone else's screwed-up lifestyle.

Can you believe this? Baucus' committee got something right!

Looks like it. I heard McCaskill yesterday speaking out about these advertisements on cable television for scooters. She says many of these scooters are for people who don't need them. She's right. They're just fatasses who don't want to walk. You folks would be shocked to know how much our government spends on these things. Hint ... look way past hundreds of millions.

Besides .. they really can clog up a walking path.

Photographer saw this kid walking, so it wasn't that she is disabled. Click through the picture to see photographer's notes. You will need a Flickr account to view though.

We have heard a lot about obesity this week, thanks to the revelation that almost 10% of Americans' healthcare spending is due to blubberbutts. Then the Democrats promise that their healthcare bill will fund "the fight" against obesity. Then I read a story like this, from the UK, and I can't help but think, "Coming soon to the United States."

A 25-year-old woman by the name of Laura Ripley was such a lardass that the government considered her disabled. So the taxpayers fork over $15,000 so she can have a weight loss surgery. She loses enough weight to the point where the government no longer considers her disabled. Now Laura Ripley is throwing a fit. Do you know why? Because the government reduced her welfare checks because she is no longer disabled. Now she says that she can't afford healthy food and she is starting to gain weight.

Consider this ... this woman has never held a job in her life. She is a mooch. She is a looter. She is a welfare broodmare. She gets paid by the taxpayers to sit on her fat ass and contribute NOTHING to society. With that, she goes to the National Health Service to get this weight loss surgery. Then after she loses the weight, she complains because now she has less moocher money to pay for her bon bons and tea biscuits. She says, 'I can't afford to buy Weight Watchers crisps and cereal bars any more so I eat Tesco's chocolate bars and packets of Space Invaders crisps, sometimes four of each a day ... People ask why I don't snack on an apple - they're cheap, but emotionally I don't always feel like an apple.'

Not only that, but she blames the government for treating her unfairly and causing her to gain weight again. 'It's heartbreaking that after all my hard work losing this weight someone's come along and ruined it.' That's right. It's not her personal responsibility. It is the government's fault.

There's no other way to say this, and it's not as if you haven't already noticed. American is becoming a nation of fat, disgusting lardasses. We are a nation of overindulgent blubberbutts. One third of American adults are obese. Visual observations would point you to a higher number.

But it didn't always used to be this way. The obesity rate in America has risen 37% from 1998 to 2006, this according to a study published by the journal Health Affairs. Along with expanding waste lines comes .. you guessed it .. expanded healthcare costs. Obesity-related health spending has doubled in one decade to $147 billion. That's because being a lardass has its consequences: diabetes, heart disease, scooters. All of these things cost money. In fact, obese people can expect to pay an average of $1,400 more every year than a normal person on medical expenses. I don't have a problem with that. They chose to gorge and live an unhealthy lifestyle, and they should be made to pay for the consequences.

Now the Democrats have whined and moaned about the increased cost of healthcare. This is one of the main reasons why they say they want healthcare reform - to control the 'sky-rocketing' costs of healthcare. Even though their plans will not lower or control the price of healthcare one bit. But that is beside the point. Why they've also failed to tell you in that 9.1% of medical spending in this country is spent on obesity-related conditions. Just one decade ago, that number was only 6.5%.

OK ... so here's a suggestion. Senator Looser (John Kerry) is proposing a tax on what he calls "gold-plated" health care plans. Well, these plans aren't the problem. If some people work harder than others and can thereby afford more comprehensive healthcare plans ... why should they be punished? If Kerry and the rest of his Democrat sycophants think they can lower healthcare costs through taxation, how about a fat tax? The VAT seems popular with these people .. why not a FAT? The Fat Accumulation Tax. The heavier you are the more taxes you pay to cover the cost of your extra medical care.

You get more of the behavior you reward. Lower taxes on the productive Americans who are powering our economy. You get less of the behavior you punish .. a FAT tax. Make these people pay for their slovenly habits and watch them thin down. And don't give me this poverty nonsense either ... if you can afford the FAT, don't eat the fat.

First of all, there is a little debate brewing right now over Barack Obama's pick for surgeon general. The woman is Regina Benjamin, and Dr. Benjamin is not what you would describe as a "flatbelly." In fact, some people are choosing to describe her as a blubberbutt ... which is a big deal only because she is supposed to be the "public face" of healthcare initiatives in this country. Well .. they have a point. Obesity is a huge problem in this country. I wonder how many Medicare and Medicaid dollars are spent every year to handle obesity-related diseases. Now we have a fat Surgeon General? There is a way through this one. Dr. Benjamin should immediately go on a diet. She should make a public show of admitting her slovenly and self-indulgent eating habits, and pledge to drop about 50 or so big ones. Then she could invite the fleshier part of America to join in. Could turn a negative into a plus and do something about the lardassification of America.

Also, one other little goodie. Looks like some Democrats are feeling the heat for their support of this government-run healthcare scheme. Maryland Senator Ben Cardin hosted a townhall meeting the other night on healthcare. When one particular audience member got upset about this healthcare bill stepping on our ... freedoms ... Senator Cardin's response was, "I just think the overriding public interest is to require you and everyone in this country to have health insurance." So there you go. Now our Senator's are voting based on what they believe would be best for the "public's interest."

Don't you just love it when some political hack uses the word "require?" I'll tell you what the federal government ought to require. It ought to require that every person respect the rights of every other person, and to desist from the use of force or fraud in any attempt to violate another person's right to life, liberty or property. Beyond that, butt out.

.... Before we get into the reading assignments.

To all you obese women out there wearing sleeveless shirts and waddling into the 7-11 in the early morning hours to get a breakfast burrito the size of a roll of paper towels and a few donuts ... those tattoos on your ankles and calves really DO make you look slimmer. No! I swear! They do! And those cigarettes hanging out of your mouths add an aura of sensuality that is hard to describe. Sorry if I've ever suggested otherwise. I just don't know what I could have been thinking.

One good thing about a nice snow storm? It keeps our kids out of government schools. Every day spent out of a government school is a good day for one of our children.

Did someone call in today to tell you they can't get to work because of the snow? Put them at the top of the list to be canned as out economy worsens. Especially if they voted for Obama.

Before the show is over today someone remind me to tell you how I almost capped my wetsuit with a .357 over the weekend.

Snow all over the place on March 1st. When are the idiots among us going to wake up to this global warming fraud?

Snoop Dogg is now a Muslim. Seems like a good fit to me. How about Snoop Mohammed Dogg. Wait! I thought Muslims considered Doggs to be unclean? Well ... look at Snoop. Again ... a good fit.

Four men are missing in a small fishing boat off the coast of Clearwater, Florida. Two of them are jocks. Guess where the news will focus.

I always look forward to Monday morning. Shower day.

Can you people help me come up with a clever new name for those insipid scooters we're buying for fat folks with Medicare money? So far I've come up with "Blubber Buggies" and "Slob Sleds." It's early .... You do know that the taxpayers spend over a billion a year buying these things don't you? About $1 million for folks who actually need them .. .the rest for lazy slobs.

What happened to that blond Fox News money hunny? Sure bulked up, didn't she? Shall we chip in and get her a scooter?

I know I'm dwelling on these scooters .. but just to show you that some people actually need them I'll reminisce about the time Ben Jones was riding one of those at a Renaissance Weekends on Hilton Head. He was recovering from knee surgery. I called it the "Cooter Scooter." He didn't smile. You? You probably don't get it. Wonder what Ben Jones is doing today?

OK! Enough already. I now know I can buy K-Cups at Bed, Bath and Beyond.

Yup .. the fight is over. For years I've been hearing fatsos say that they couldn't do anything about their weight because it was "in their genes." Now some scientists have told us that there is some virus out there that causes obesity. Fine, just fine. Now we're going to have these lardasses eating their stacks of pancakes for breakfast, their Whoppers for lunch, and mounds of pasta for dinner - followed by ice cream - and they'll tell us they are overweight because they have a virus. The battle is indeed lost. Just so I don't have to sit next to one of these fleshy flier tubs of lard wearing a sleeveless shirt on a cross country flight.

This statistic should astound you .. then again, if you have been to Disney World lately, maybe not. The number of American adults who are obese has surpassed the number of adults who are merely overweight. More than 34% of adults are considered obese. That is more than 72 million Americans. This is compared to 32.7% of adults who are just overweight. I'm not a genius, but that means that almost 70% of our population is made up of lardassess ... blubber butts .. however you want to classify them.

But don't worry, now we have an excuse. Because of the downturn in the economy, health professionals are worried that Americans are going to gain more weight. More weight?? They are calling it "recession pounds" and it is exactly what you think: people in a recession spend less money on food and end up buying a lot of junk and fluff for their money. They aren't eating as healthy and therefore gain weight. Naturally this affects the poor the most. EVERYTHING affects the poor the most. Even the end of the world will have a disproportionate affect on the poor. Don't worry .. I'm sure the Obama administration is working on a government program to make grocery-buying a fair playing field for everyone.

The Canadian Supreme Court has ruled that airlines must offer a free extra seat to people who are disabled or obese. The policy called "one person, one fare" was upheld by the Supreme Court, despite the airlines' desire to charge more to people who take up more than one seat. What this means is that the government is telling private companies how to run their businesses. The government is making decisions as to how airlines should charge their customers.

National Health Service officials in Great Britain are rolling out a new plan to pay blubberbutts to lose weight. Yep, the government healthcare system of Great Britain will spend about $9 million to reward widebodies for trying to lose weight. And that $9 million, folks, is just for one town - Manchester - which will act as a guinea pig for this scheme. No pun intended.

The Points4Life program will allow obese people to win points on their NHS loyalty card (a loyalty card?). They will earn points by showing up to health clubs or exercise classes ...even if they don't lose any weight! They can also gain points by running or walking in the local park where you can swipe your government issued card at a government-run exercise machine that will track your exercise. They can gain points by simply walking their children to school rather than driving them or taking public transportation to work. If they buy healthy food (according to the government's definition of healthy) they can also earn points.

In exchange for your healthy behavior you can use the points to buy health products and services or get discounts on healthy food.

Are you seeing where this is going, folks? Government healthcare cards that track your exercise. Government-sponsored exercise equipment in parks. And who tracks whether or not you walk your child to school in the morning? Oh and the government will also offer "a new award scheme" to encourage restaurants to stock more healthy food. People living in government housing will be encouraged to join a 'grow your own' fruit and vegetable scheme.

This is the government-run healthcare system of the United Kingdom. And you really want this to happen to our great nation?